Monday, February 4, 2013

Day 16: What Made You Cry Recently?

Ooh, this one is going to be a tough one. I'm an emotional person by nature, so I cry often just to release frustration and tension, so sorry if you think this is a silly thing to cry over.

This is also tough because I'm afraid that if I tell what happened, the person who I will speak of will know exactly who they are. 

But then again this is something they should know that it's not ok if they're reading this:

So I cried recently because I was betrayed by an old -and what I thought to be best - friend. We had run into each other at a large event on campus and this friend insisted that we meet and catch up sometime. I made this friend a priority in my schedule to meet with them at the end of the week for lunch. I'm a busy person, but I try to put my friends and relationships first.

So the end of the week came, and the scheduled time to meet came upon us. It would have been easier for my schedule to leave a half-hour before the meeting due to my work schedule, but I accommodated assuming this would be worth it.

I waited at the designated spot to meet. And waited. And waited. And thankfully I had another friend keep me company for part of the time so I wasn't humiliated waiting in this public area. But fifteen minutes passed, then a half hour, and I hadn't heard anything. So I finally call and this friend didn't even bother to answer the call. I get a text ten minutes later that said,

"Last minute schedule change - can we postpone meeting up? I feel super bad, but today's not looking too good anymore."

The friend never rescheduled. And for the record, that text was not a valid reason.

A person who I made a priority only made me an option. I was embarrassed and hurt. I looked back at that last hour and thought of the many other friends I could've spent that hour of lunch who would have actually valued my time with instead of standing around waiting for somebody who is no longer worth my time.

I was upset because I realized I wouldn't, heck, couldn't be friends with this person anymore. And we used to be the best of friends, that's what made it really hard.

So I cried. And I don't talk to that person anymore.

But I'm grateful for the friends who are always there for me. In this low moment I had others come in and turn my sorrow into joy. One thing I've never regretted in my life is always choosing quality over quantity when it comes to those I can trust and confide in. I am one of the lucky ones because I have some amazing friends and I've always found one true friend throughout my life.

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