Sunday, February 23, 2014

Pork and Beans

So Punk Rock has entered my life again.

Lately the Weezer song sums up my attitude. Namely the lyrics, "I don't got a thing to prove to you," "I don't give a hoot what you think" and "I don't care, I don't care, I don't care!"

And it's shown.

Exhibit A: I would wear my white tee, moccasins, and skinny jeans every day if it was socially acceptable. As I was leaving to go to some dessert night, a guy hanging out with my roommate asked, "Are you dressed to impress anybody?" and I scoffed. I can't remember the last time I wore clothes to impress someone, I wear them for me.

Exhibit B: Once upon a time I was self-conscious about how young I was in my typical setting which consists of an older demographic. Now I honestly "don't give a hoot" - they're old, I'm awesome. Their problem if they can't deal with 22, which I frequently forget I am anyway. And 22 is an awesome age, anyway.

Exhibit C: Punk Rock returning to my life. Lacking propriety.

Exhibit D: I realized I hadn't shaved in over a week and still wore a skirt (pros to being blonde). I also stopped painting my nails.

Exhibit E: I don't really care to put "a face" for people - either they like me for who I am or that's their problem. Forget the mouth filter sometimes.

In a nutshell: there's only so much time and energy one human has the capacity to commit in a day, some things aren't worth worrying about right now.

However, apathy has produced something beautiful: I can see and appreciate others because I'm not so worried about myself.

Now that I don't focus on what people think of me, I can focus on what they say, how they feel, them them them! I'm developing deeper friendships, it's fantastic.

In case you're worried though, here is the list of things I care about right now just so you know I'm not screwing my life over:
  • My salvation
  • Doing a good job at work
  • Running the half marathon and getting in the best shape I have ever been in
  • Eating well, feeling good
  • Split ends
  • How white and clean my teeth are
  • My friends and family
  • How I'm going to get into reading again
  • Playing violin
  • Editing
Yeah, that's about it.

But, you know, whatever.

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